Shots Across The Bow

What Do You Bring to the Table?

Rod Serling A man eating dinner gets a chance to meet his idol. But our idols often prove to have feet of clay when we see them up close. We come away disappointed, and feel cheated, almost deceived. That is, we do unless our meeting takes place...in The Twilight Zone.

Submitted for your approval: A Change in Attitude.

A guy was eating dinner in a restaurant one evening when he noticed his favorite movie star sitting a few tables over, quietly eating his dinner. Our man tried to contain his excitement at this opportunity to meet his idol, and he quietly motioned for his wife to look over at the other table.

"Look," he whispered, "It's Dash Riprock! Dash Riprock sitting in the same restaurant as I am! I knew he grew up here, but I never thought he'd come back. I have to go over and say hello!"

His wife was a bit more cautious. "Now dear, the man is trying to eat his dinner in peace. At least wait until he gets to his dessert!"

But our hero was too impatient to follow her wise counsel. "What if he skips dessert? What if somebody else recognizes him and I miss my chance. No, I need to go over there now. Besides, he's no different than the rest of us. He grew up a few blocks from my cousin's sister's boyfriend's bus driver. That makes us practically neighbors. He'll be happy to see somebody from the old neighborhood.

So our Hero gets up and walks over to Dash's table, where Dash is quietly chewing on a particularly nice piece of ribeye.

"Mr. Riprock, sir! It's an honor to meet you. I can't believe you're actually here. Dash Riprock! Action hero and Movie star. Sir, I am one of your biggest fans."

"Mmmh-hmrph." Riprock tried to speak around the wad of beef without showing it to the world.

"Yessir, your last movie, "Ramrock 12: The Penultimate Nightmare" was my favorite movie this year. I thought it was much better than number 3, 7, 8, 9, and 10. It wasn't quite as good as 1 and 11, but how do you top dropping an aircraft carrier over St. Peter's Basilica in order to save the world from a nuclear nightmare?"

"Mmmr-Glad you liked it." Riprock finally achieved the ability to speak somewhat intelligibly.

"Liked it? I loved it! And it was so believable, too. When you discovered that the Pope's illegitimate son was actually the evil mastermind behind the plot to corner the market on solar power, boy, I didn't see that one coming!"

"Well, if you liked that one, you'll really love "Ramrock 13: The Next New Beginning." I can't tell you what's going to happen, but I'll tell you this much. Not everyone who dies really dies."

"Awesome!"

Riprock forked another piece of steak and said "Well, it's been nice meeting you. I always like to talk to a fan, but my dinner's getting cold. Thanks for coming over to talk to me and I'll see you at the movies!" He put the steak in his mouth and began to cut another piece, obviously enjoying his dinner.

Our Heroes' smile dimmed. Riprock was giving him the brushoff? How dare he? Didn't he realize that his fans were the ones who bought the steak he was eating this very minute! He stalked back to his table.

"I never would have thought that Dash Riprock would go Hollywood on us!" he said. "He's forgotten where he came from! "

"What happened?" his wife asked.

"I went over to talk to him and he just brushed me off! Gave me some gladhanding little quip about his next movie and went back to eating just as if I wasn't there. The nerve of some people! If I didn't go to his movies, he wouldn't be able to eat that fat steak he was cramming into his mouth. I have half a mind to never see another Dash Riprock movie again."

His wife, who thought to herself that he may have been overestimating himself, kept silent.

When our Hero went to pay his bill, he discovered that Riprock had taken care of it for him.

"As if that makes up for his rudeness," he exclaimed. "He can't buy me the way he buys his cheap groupies. I said I wasn't going to watch any more of his movies and I meant it!"

Rod SerlingAnd so another idol falls, proven to have feet of clay. We raise our heroes up on pedestals, and then reject them when they fail to measure up to our expectations. But it doesn't have to be that way. All it takes is a simple change in our expectations.

A guy was eating dinner in a restaurant one evening when he noticed his favorite movie star sitting a few tables over, quietly eating his dinner. Our man tried to contain his excitement at this opportunity to meet his idol, and he quietly motioned for his wife to look over at the other table.

"Look," he whispered, "It's Dash Riprock! Dash Riprock sitting in the same restaurant as I am! I knew he grew up here, but I never thought he'd come back. I have to go over and say hello!"

His wife was a bit more cautious. "Now dear, the man is trying to eat his dinner in peace. At least wait until he gets to his dessert!"

But our hero was too impatient to follow her wise counsel. "What if he skips dessert? What if somebody else recognizes him and I miss my chance. No, I need to go over there now. He grew up a few blocks from my cousin's sister's boyfriend's bus driver. That makes us practically neighbors. But don't worry; I'll be polite!"

So our Hero gets up and walks over to Dash's table, where Dash is quietly chewing on a particularly nice piece of ribeye.

"Mr. Riprock, sir! It's an honor to meet you. I can't believe you're actually here. Dash Riprock! Action hero and Movie star. Sir, I am one of your biggest fans."

"Mmmh-hmrph." Riprock tried to speak around the wad of beef without showing it to the world.

"Yessir, your last movie, "Ramrock 12: The Penultimate Nightmare" was my favorite movie this year. I thought it was much better than number 3, 7, 8, 9, and 10. It wasn't quite as good as 1 and 11, but how do you top dropping an aircraft carrier over St. Peter's Basilica in order to save the world from a nuclear nightmare?"

"Mmmr-Glad you liked it." Riprock finally achieved the ability to speak somewhat intelligibly.

"Liked it? I loved it! And it was so believable, too. When you discovered that the Pope's illegitimate son was actually the evil mastermind behind the plot to corner the market on solar power, boy, I didn't see that one coming!"

"Well, if you liked that one, you'll really love "Ramrock 13: The Next New Beginning." I can't tell you what's going to happen, but I'll tell you this much. Not everyone who dies really dies."

"Awesome!"

Riprock forked another piece of steak and said "Well, it's been nice meeting you. I always like to talk to a fan, but my dinner's getting cold. Thanks for coming over to talk to me and I'll see you at the movies!" He put the steak in his mouth and began to cut another piece, obviously enjoying his dinner.

Our Heroes' smiled. "It was great to meet you too. I'm sorry for interrupting your dionner and thanks for talking to me. You're awesome!"

He went back to his table where his wife asked him what had happened.

"I went over to talk to him and even though he was obviously trying to enjoy his dinner, he took a few minutes to chat with me about his movies, and he even gave me a couple of hints about the next one! I knew he was a good guy. Guys from around here don't go Hollywood. They remember where they came from. I can't wait for the next movie to come out!"

When our Hero went to pay his bill, he discovered that Riprock had taken care of it for him.

"Doesn't that just top the cake?" he exclaimed. "He bought our dinner, even though I interrupted his. Dash Riprock is aces in my book."

Rod Serling What you have just witnessed happens a million times every day. Identical encounters leaving opposite impression based solely on our own expectations. We see what we expect to see and hear what we expect to hear. When we sit down to dinner, we eat what we brought to the table. That's true everywhere, especially here, in The Twilight Zone

Ok, that's all well and good, but why did I put this in the political category? Watch the following campaign video.

I watch it, and I see a video that makes fun of Obama's oratorical tendency to puff himself up. He's a brilliant speaker and can move a crowd like nobody's business, but I find it hard to swallow that the ocean stopped rising just because he won the Democratic nomination. He has a gift for hyperbole and this ad pointed that out.

That's what I saw.

David Gergen saw a racist attack on Obama.

As a native of the south, I can tell you, when you see this Charlton Heston ad, 'The One,' that's code for, 'he's uppity, he ought to stay in his place.' Everybody gets that who is from a southern background.

Mr. Gergen, I'm from Tennessee and I didn't get that. Obama has an inflated opinion of himself that has absolutely nothing to do with the color of his skin. The clips in that ad were not taken out of context and were not distorted. He did say those things. Obama's experience and credentials are a bit on the thin side, and for him to make pronouncements like he does cries out for lampooning.

So, Mr Gergen, what is you are bringing to the table?

On a local note, Mr. R. Neal watches the ad and sees the Anti-Christ.

I don't even want to know what Randy is bringing to the table...

Posted by Rich at August 4, 2008 3:14 PM | TrackBack