Shots Across The Bow

Sitting there in the doctor's office, it appeared that they had nothing in common. Although they were both 17, they dressed differently; their families were different; they lived in different parts of town; they hung out with different crowds; even the music they listend to was different. If you passed them on the street, you'd never know that they had anything at all in common; you'd think that their stories would be completely different, and for the most part you'd be right. But for a few brief moments, their stories converged to bring them here, to a doctor's office.

Fear.

One girl masked it in irritation, constantly moving in her seat, picking up a magazine, turning a few pages then tossing it down on the small table, only to pick it back up a moment later. This cycle repeated endlessly, punctuated by loud sighs and exasperated glares at anyone who met her gaze. By contrast, the other girl sat quietly in the waiting room, her head down and her gaze fixed firmly on a single spot of the bland carpet. She appeared to be doing her best at becoming invisible, and succeeding remarkably well at it.

But it was fear that drove both of them; fear of finding out something that they already knew in their hearts, otherwise they would't be here in this waiting room on this day.

Time crawled as they sat in the room, waiting impatiently for their name to be called, but when it was called, they each wished for more time, for a few more moments of ignorance before their worlds changed forever.

Once they had their turns in the examination room, time condensed to a blur of questions, examinations, prescriptions for vitamins, and about 15 different pamphlets and brochures about what they could expect over the next several months. But through it all, they really only heard one word.

Pregnant.

It echoed and reverberated, looming larger and louder in their heads like an oncoming freight train, driving out everything else the doctor said.

"I'm pregnant," they each thought, dazed by the shock of confirmation. There was no emotion attached to the thought, not yet. It was too big, too much to process. What would happen next? What could they do? How would their lives change? Wold they have any lives left?

What would their parents say?

And here is where their stories once again diverge.

One girl, call her Abigail, went home, and waited a few days to work up the courage to tell her mother. She knew she had to tell her eventually, but was afraid because she didn't know how her mother would react, and she knew how her father would. He'd yell at her, call her names, tell her how stupid she was, and try and force her to give up the baby, either to an abortion or an adoption. He'd always told her that only bad girls or very stupid girls got pregnant, and no daughter of his was bad or stupid, so if she got pregnant, then she wouldn't be his daughter anymore. She hoped her mother would stand between her and her father to cushion his rage. Abigail hoped she'd be more supportive, and would help her throughout the pregnancy, and to raise her child.

She was disappointed.

Abigail's mother was furious, and told that if she was old enough to make the adult decision to have sex, and old enough to decide to keep her baby, then she was old enough to take on other adult responsibilities as well. Far from helping her during her pregnancy, her mother said that Abigail would either have to move out of the house, or start paying rent, and that meant dropping out of school and getting a job. She told Abigail that she had just ruined her life, despite all the effort she'd put into raising her right, and she refused to waste anymore time and effort since it obviously wasn't doing any good. Abigail's father was just as bad as she'd suspected, calling her nasty names, and trying to force her to give the baby up for adoption.

Knowing that nine months in that house would break her heart and spirit, Abigail moved out and got a small apartment with her baby's father, a guy only a year or two out of high school himself. She dropped out of school, and got a job waiting tables that lasted until she couldn't physically do the work anymore. Then she just stayed home alone while her boyfriend worked twomshifts to try and make ends meet. By the time the baby came, whatever love there was between her and the father had died, strangled by brutally hard work and grinding poverty. He saw his daughter born, held her for a moment in the hospital, then walked away, never to be heard from again.

Left with no choices, Abigail moved back home with her baby girl. It was better than she'd expected; babies have a way of helping people get past hurts they'd given and received. When the baby was old enough, Abigail went back to work while her mother watched little Eva for her. Abigail's father doted on little Eva, and eventually, he told Abigail that he was proud of the decisions she'd made, and the strength of character she'd shown in the face of her parents' anger.

And so her life went on. Eva hadn't been the great tragedy of her life; that honor went to the emotional outbursts and anger that accompanied her conception. Instead, little Eva became a small slice of salvation, bridging the gaps and knitting the family back together. Abigail's life was changed irrevocably the day she learned she was pregnant. Her dreams of college and a career as an architect were ended on that day. But she had a beautiful little girl, and that counts for a lot.

But did her dreams have to die?

Let's turn out attention to the other girl in our story, call her Eileen. She too left the doctor's office afraid to tell her parents the news, but she knew that they would support her because they had told her that they would. Her parents were divorced and she lived with her father. They had talked about sex, and birth control, and what could happen Her father had said that if she decided to be sexually active to let him know and he would make sure she went to the doctor and got on the pill, or whatever form of contraception the doctor recommended. He'd also told her that if she ever did become pregnant, that he would do whatever it took to make sure that it wasn't the end of her plans and dreams, that instead of throwing her out, he would help her in every way he could.

But she was still scared, because she knew he woud be disappointed that she hadn't been careful, and had made a bad decision.

She walked into the living roomwhere he was watching television and just blurted out her news.

"Well, I've got big news," she chirped, "I'm pregnant!"

Her father wasn't sure she was serious. He saw a twinkle in her eye, and thought she was just kidding since she'd just come back from her first gyno appointment.

"Are you kidding?" he asked carefully.

"No," she said, and it was only then that he could see that the twinkle in her eye was actually a film of tears, as she fought to hold them back.

He got up from his chair and enfolded her in a hug, trying to show her that everything was going to be OK, and that he wasn't angry. He wondered what to say to her, how to ease her fear and her pain. He was prepared to handle any eventuality but one, and that one was abortion. He prayed briefly for guidance, and then spoke to her.

"I know you're scared, but it'll be alright. Whatever it takes, we'll do it. You know that I love you and I'll take care of you no matter what. You know how I feel about abortion, but that is a decision that you'll have to make for yourself."

She stopped him right there and said, "I've already decided; I want to keep my baby."

He sighed with relief. His biggest worry was no longer on the table. His little girl had made a big mistake, but she wasn't trying to run away from the consequences of her decision. He heard the firm decisive tone in her voice and he was proud of her.

"Okay sweetie, here's what I want you to do. I know you're scared, and it's understandable, but as much as possible, I want you to relax. We're all going to be here for you, and while the circumstances could be better, the important thing that I want you to focus on is that you're growing a baby, and that's the closest thing to a miracle most people ever come. You're growing a new life inside you, and that's a very cool thing. We'll take care of everything else; you just take care of yourself and that little guy growing inside of you."

"It's a girl, Dad," she said. "I just feel it."

"Okay, then take care of that little girl growing inside of you. I'm not picky."

Eileen laughed a bit, and he could feel the tension melt from her. Yes, there were going to be tough times ahead, but with the full support of her family, she and her baby would be okay. With a little hard work and sacrifice, she could still go to college and fulfill her dreams.