Shots Across The Bow

My Last Post

Folks, it's been 4 years and just over 2300 posts since I started this thing. I've talked about everything under the sun, shared large portions of my life with you, wrote jokes told stories, and even offered up an entertaining science lesson or two. I've spent countless hours working to come up with enjoyable posts, written with a certain style and flair. I've done research, looking up facts in government databases, always an exciting time, let me tell you. I've had encounters both real and virtual with the famous, the near famous, the almost famous, and the infamous. I've met some really nice people and gone shooting with them. I've caused a well known columnist to throw a conniption fit in front of the entire blogosphere. I've been the recipient of many Instalanches. I've outlasted millions of other bloggers. I've seen my traffic grow from a dozen hits a day to a couple of hundred, some of which represent actual people and not comment spambots.

And what do I have to show for all this work?

A couple million words on a server in Florida and $1.63 in the tip jar!

I mean, I got into this whole blogging thing like everybody else, to meet women, and it just hasn't happened. I don't know what the problem is but I haven't gotten a single date from this thing and I've got calluses on my butt from sitting in this chair so long.

You know, when Carrot Top gets more groupies than you do, it's a sign that it's time to make a change.

And so I'm done.

No, I won't be back. And I won't hang around and comment on other people's sites.

I'm done.

I've got nothing else to say, and even if I did, I don't want to say it here.

I'm done. Not another word.

I'm going to find a social life, dammit, one with women in it, and not relatives but real women I can kiss and not feel funny afterward. (Sharing too much again, aren't I?)

I'm done. I'm gone.

Out the door, putting a lock on the keyboard, erasing my bookmarks and moving off into the real world. Forget the blogosphere, I'm venturing out into the...ummm...realosphere.

I mean it this time. I really do. Not another word. There's really nothing left to say. Except that post I'm working on about my aquarium. And the posts I've come up with about remodeling the house. Oh yeah, and some new stuff about the kids, including an announcement about one of them.

But that's it. There isn't anything more I have to say. I'm done.

Except that I've had a really good time doing this, and really enjoyed meeting all of you that I've met whether virtually or really. (really? Yeah, I guess it works.)

I'm outta here. I'm Caspar.

Thanks to Instapundit, for getting me started, Uncle for getting me shooting, Les for letting me pick his brains about ecommerce, Michael for linking so often, and of course my loyal readers, both of whom have made all the blood and sweat I poured into this page worthwhile.

But all good things must end, and the same goes for this blog. So here they are; we've come to it at last: the final words of the final post of this blog.

I've thought about them for awhile, considering what to say if this day ever came to pass. What can I say that I haven't already said? What explanation can I give that doesn't sound hopelessly corny, or obscenely egotistical? I debated endlessly, wrote hundreds of "Final Statements" that summed up everything that I've been trying to say for the last 4 years. And I realized that it was an impossible task, so I decided to try and just hit the highlights. Since there really were no highlights, that idea failed as well. So finally, after much deliberation and careful thought, I came up with the following 7 words:

Just kidding folks. I'll see you tomorrow!

Posted by Rich at January 23, 2006 11:35 PM | TrackBack